- Jaromir Jagr - I hate you like a cancer. Because you are one. But you pulled off your 1500th career point this week, and that's commendable. You may not have any heart. You may not be any type of leader. You may be a bigger baby than everyone of the Muppet Babies combined. You do have talent, and for that, I commend you.
- Rick DiPietro - Has a GAA of 1.5 in his last 5 starts. Unfortunately, the Islanders have only won two of those games. If that team makes the playoffs, it'll be entirely up to the Rick.
- Calgary Flames - Taking over first in the NW division makes them hot. Their logo makes them flaming.
- Bryan Murray - Closing in soon on 600 wins, this former Capitals, Red Wings, Panthers, and Ducks Coach, and current Senators coach is also rapidly closing in on his 6th career playoff win.
- Dallas Stars - The Fallopian Tubes (no really, they used to use that logo) are climbing up on the rest of their division contenders, the Sharks and the Ducks. Of course . . .
- Ladislav Nagy - Why does one acquire someone underachieving this horribly in a contract season? Isn't their any concern his moodiness will throw off the rest of the team? I know they were desperate for scoring, but wasn't Petr Nedved on waivers just a month ago?
- The NHL Schedule - Weeks with one game are boring. Why does a team have 4 games in 7 days, and then one game in 7 days? This is my way of shifting the blame for a lack of updates.
- Anaheim Ducks - Going 3-7 in their last 10 makes one wonder if they should go back to being "Mighty?"
- Red Wings Goaltending - Osgood? Injured. Hassek? Injured. So they've got two guys in there that have less experience than your average 15 year old. Do I need to link to another pic of the Muppet Babies, or do we get the point?
- Olie Kolzig - A knee injury has him out for three weeks. Caps fans officially cancel parade that they never really got around to start planning.